Noah on the Ark. Moses on Sinai. Jesus in the desert.
All forty day trials.
But instead of my proverbial skies clearing or breaking a fast, I went to a first grade picnic with my daughters. I enjoyed watching Leslie with her friends, playing and having fun. I enjoyed seeing Kenna loving being "at school." But mostly, I loved that when Leslie got all hot and tired and sweaty, she came and sat next to me and laid her head on my lap.
With all my fears about missing my children in these short, special years- that simple act of exhaustion wiped many of them away. My oldest is still my little girl. She still wants to be seen being affectionate with her Dad- and when Kenna saw Leslie, she joined in as well. The sweetness was almost too much.
I never envisioned myself with girls, mostly because they perplexed the heck out of me. So when I was blessed with two of them, I feared I'd spend the rest of my life in abject confusion. And I have. There are already mood swings and emotions and talk of boys. (A conversation arose today about one of Leslie's classmates who I deduced liked a boy. When I asked Leslie if she "liked liked" any boys, she quickly said not yet. Before those words died in the air, Kenna said, "There are boys I like." I can only shake my head.)
But in the midst of that confusion is a sweetness and a gentleness no boy would ever offer.
And though my trial will be entering the second (hopefully "back") forty days, I can rest in the appreciation of the affection I receive from my wonderful children.
And that's not too shabby.
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